Learn to Listen

One soft skill we should all develop is to be great listeners. Be it with our spouse, children and friends. However, we have built into our daily lives a series of habits and patterns and our subconscious automatically kicks in when we hear something be it good or bad. This is due too the stress and worries we face each day from our work and daily lives. We sometimes jump into conclusion without analyzing the words we hear. Perhaps we hear without listening correctly.

If we do not like what we hear, we invariably switch off and consequently; we misconstrue messages or just stop listening. We should at least digest the words and ponder. Stand back and really listen to what is being said. Stop and think before hitting “auto-respond ”.

I think I still have to develop this skill in making me a better listener especially listening to my children. With my spouse I think I have achieved great success. hahaha. Do we really listen?

“Figure out what went wrong, not who was wrong, when communication breaks down.”

The media should stop highlighting the AP issue,says some wise politikus

I am amused that there are some quarters asking the newspapers not to highlight the AP issue. “Exco member Dr Noraessah Mohamad said the media should stop highlighting the issue.” Why doesn’t she ask TM not to have the press conference than there will be no AP issue/ news? It’s like barking at the wrong tree, blaming the press for the wrong doing. The AP issue is here to stay until TM is satisfied with the answers given.

To asked the newspapers not to highlight the AP issue. Maybe they can to a certain extend. Luckily we have blogs to read or else I don’t know what they will be hiding from us.

Perhaps to be transparent means not to highlight the AP issue. I don’t know you tell me.

Mahathir responsed with a punch

Former PM Mahathir Mohamad has responded . The facts are all stated and I am impressed by the press conference he had given. At the age of 80, he is quick-minded and sharp-tongued as ever with the abilities to capture the minds of the audiences. I'm not senile, as he smiley said referring to comment that he had forgotten somethings he had approved long ago.

He now looks like a hero to the Malaysian public especially on the AP issue saying that the AP issue is still an issue not settle yet. The minister Rafidah Aziz says that it should be closed at the UMNO assembly and no more an issue. The silly analogy explanation she gave, I doubt the UMNO delegates plus the whole Malaysian public would believe her explanation.

Let’s see the next step of actions. It’s so good to see the truth coming out from both sides. Just let’s wait and see. The best is yet to come.

My nephew so cute!!!

Wah my nephew so cute, he is just 2 years old and looks so adorable. Time really flies I can still remember when he was just a baby and now a toddler.


My nephew(Photo taken 24/7/2005)

During this period, he learns a great deal about social roles and develops motor skills.Since I always give him goodies to eat everytime he sees me he will ask for mum,mum (eat). He likes to talks a lot, playful and very energetic. He just like to mumble some kind of toddler talks that sometimes I can understand and at times I am blur.

I am sure he will be a cute guy in a few years time.

What's for lunch when I have to cook.

My partner is down with a flu and sore throat. She has been not feeling well since Friday I hope she will recover or else I have to bring her to the doctor come tomorrow. I hate it when my partner is sick. So here I am going to be cooking lunch tomorrow (Sunday 24/7/2005). I was pondering what to cook; something simple yet tasty.(easy for me meh) Look through a few recipe books have a dozen of them in the drawer. (My partner favourite hobby is cooking)

Finally I found the simple dish and have decided to cook Koay Teow Soup with different kind of fish balls and lots of vegetables. So I am going to the market early in morning to buy the ingredients after sending my daughter to her tuition class.

Hopefully the lunch will turn out delicious.

Happy marketing to me…………

11.00am.(24/7/2005 Sunday)
Update: This is the final product for my simple lunch. Simple yet tasty especially the soup.Cost of list of ingredients only RM19.00 for the whole family. Mmmmmm......... very affordable.

The preparation

Cooking the soup

What's in the pot? Fishballs and cabbage with chicken soup.

Ringgit new value against USD

Latest Ringgit value against USD is 3.788( USD1=RM3.788) opening morning trade. It looks like there is not much change as lot of people has said that the ringgit will appreciate to RM3.50.(USD 1=RM3.50)

As at 10am today it looks like not much changed had happened as most people have wrongly predicted.

The Force Is With Them

Batman?/Terrorist?

My thoughts: At one glance I was thinking OMG terrorists in training somewhere then I realised that the perception I have is not always the truth. Silly me. Maybe it's because of the media and TV that I had been exposed everyday that developed my mind set in such a way. Therefore every photo does not necessary tell a story. (With so much high tech. photos can be manipulated)

Scroll down.......for caption.

Caption for the photo:
At a graduation ceremony at Kowsar Police Academy in Teheran, March 2005. Iranian women wearing traditional chadors took part in a wall-scaling exercise. More than 100 women will assist male colleagues in the police force, graduated.

National Kidney Foundation Singapore - The Saga

I was watching the news on Singapore TV in Johore Bahru recently about the mismanagement of NKF (National Kidney Foundation) by its CEO. It really sad that such a person working for a charity organization misleads the public and uses the funds solely for his own purpose.

I am sure now many people will not be willing to donate to charity organization such as NKF anymore. People will have second thoughts if they want to donate to charity organization, just because there are a few rotten apples in this charity outfit.

Its chief executive officer Mr. T.T. Durai admits assertion its reserves would last just 3 years is 'not accurate', but when asked in court he agreed that it would last more like 30 to 40 years. Is he trying to bluff the public initially, NKF has a current reserves of Sp$262 million. Why on earth did such things happened? He pocketed Spore $1.8 million over the past three years on salary using public funds.(RM4.15million) not to mention 'among other things, a glass-paneled shower, a pricey German toilet bowl and a gold-plated tap' inside then-CEO T T Durai's office. The tap was said to have been replaced later with another of a different material. He admitted he had flown first class on NKF funds. All these luxurious items from public funds.

I just wonder how come there was no check and balance plus a level of accountability in the organization or is it just a one man show organisation. The board must be sleeping lo or the CEO has misled the board into trusting him.

If you want to work for a charity organization you can’t be earning like Sp $25,000 per month. The salary is way too much for any CEO in the market especially for a charity organization.

On 16 July 2005 after the one-hour press conference Mr. Durai said that after 37 years with the organization, he is stepping down and would also like to see some 'new blood'.

Latest: NKF gets public backlash after court revelations

My thoughts; I wish he had left long ago…………………

Ulam or Salad, my family enjoy!

My mini garden-daun cekur.(Capture this photo with morning dew on the leaves)

Ulam is a name given for an herb plants that we can eat raw or dip in boiled water before eating with rice. Daun cekur, daun kaduk, daun kesom, daun pegaga, daun pudina (mint leaf), buah petai are some of the many traditional ulam.

Ulam usually are mix together with budu (pickled tiny fish), cencaluk (pickled tiny shrimp) or sambal belacan (chili with shrimp paste) before it goes with rice.

Two plots of daun cekur just pluck and eat.

Ulam is very popular dish that is serving daily among the Malay community in the kampung. Ulam is taken from various parts of a plant that can be eaten. The various parts are the roots, leaves, seed and fruit.

Vegetables normally is consider ulam, if it’s eaten raw. Vegetables that are consider ulam are cucumber, cabbage and eggplant. Traditional ulam as mention above are ones that needed for the preparation of nasi ulam or nasi kerabu (buffalo rice).

Ulam had being claimed to be good for diabetes and high blood pressure. I don’t know how true this is? Perhaps more research could be done to prove it has many beneficial health properties.

My family have been eating ulam since my grandma days until today.(except my kids) This is because of the family background; my grandma is of nyonya heritage and we just follow the eating habits of the family until became a norm to all of us.

My favourite Malaysian (Penang) Food

Malaysian food there is no way to describe it but the best it to try it.

If I will to write down the list of Malaysian food, mmmmmmmm…….I won’t be able to do that because the list will be like never ending.

Like all Malaysian I like the local fare more than anything else. My favourite on the list are nasi lemak, popiah, laksa, nasi ulam (Traditional Mixed Rice) and many more. The ones that I have mentioned here, we would usually try cooked each of them on weekends to feed our good appetite.


Daun cekur


Daun Kesom


Daun Kaduk

The most difficult to prepare and cook is the nasi ulam (nyonya style). This is a healthy one-dish meal featuring a variety of Malaysian ingredients as well as belacan, dried shrimp, dry fish and coconut. The difficulties in getting the ingredients (all the green leaves; daun cekor, daun kaduk, daun kesom) which can be obtain freely on open vacant land by the nearby kampung. With so much development all these free greens are vanishing slowly. These are only some of the ingredients. Actually I don’t know how to prepare the whole meal but I usually just helped out in cutting the greens and do the simple task. Mum oversee the preparation is done accordingly. Here you can get a clearer picture from Peter Tan.

To prepare this dish it’s very time consuming and takes a lot of effort but the end result is simply fantastic, the taste beyond my imagination to describe. You have to try it; to say it taste BEST lo. Home made is still the best compare to the ones selling at the pasar malam. Furthermore with all the greens it’s good for the digestive system.

I think I have to get mum to teach me all the secrets to do this dish soon. Nasi ulam the way we like it home cook only.

Writing from Johore Baharu

Took the morning flight to Johore Baharu, arriving here at 1.30pm. Checked in at Puteri Pan Pacific Hotel in middle of the city. The hotel is quite good I would say. Rooms are clean and just refurbished.All is pre-arranged for.

I am here for 3 days on work matters. I will be flying back on Wed evening. I just had my dinner at one of the restaurant in City Square Complex, ordered the Portuguese Chicken with noodles and portion of the order was large. It wasn't as tasty as I would expected. Nevertheless it good to try new taste of food.

Later I went walking around the malls and just did some window shopping or rather people watching I was trying to get something special for my coming marriage anniversary.(not for me but for her)My eyes didn't see what I like so will just have to postphone the purcahse.

I am going to watch some TV and call it a night. Tomorrow have to work lo.

What will my child be?

Once you become a parent you will constantly wonder and at times worry about your child will be when he or she grows up. What career they going for in their life. Will they get mix up with bad company of friends leading to undesirable/illegal activities? Phew.........sigh I hope my children will know what is right and wrong, whom to friend. With my parenting skills learned from my parents I think I managed well as at today. I always reminded them of peer pressure from their group of friends, and if they are not comfortable with that particular friend just mix with him/her less.

Let the winds sway it for my children

Sometimes parents want to encourage their children to pursue what they want and not to the interest of the child. The parents never understand that the child might not be interested or no liking for it. From my perspective, I will definitely let my children choose whatever career they want to pursue. I have once in a while talked to my children on what they want to be in life. (Their career) Until now only my son who is pretty sure he wants to do engineering. He is also not sure what field of engineering to go for. (Maybe he thinks when his exam results are available only then will he decide)

My daughter .........says he want to be an inventor, high aspiration. I was thinking an inventor in Malaysia will there be a demand for such an occupation. Am I not optimistic for her? Silly me. I think she is an optimist for once.

Whatever my children choose on their career path I will surely 100% support them. Even if they think of studying abroad I will try my utmost to let them do it. (Hopefully I can afford)

So let our children make their own choice of career and hopefully they will be happier. It would be a shame if we as parents want our children to live our dreams through them. I have seen this happening because the parents did not achieve whatever career plan lay out for themselves.

Failure in ones career does not mean failure in LIFE.

The Ten Commandments Of Marriage

Laughter is the best medecine

I received this email from my soul mate and had a good laugh. Maybe she is telling me to listen more or I am not hearing what she says.

After reading this, sounds pretty scary to get married eh? Hehehehe.


COMMANDMENT 1
Marriages are made in heaven.
But so are thunder and lightning.

COMMANDMENT 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word
you say, talk in your sleep.

COMMANDMENT 3
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!

COMMANDMENT 4
Married life is very frustrating.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

COMMANDMENT 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of
one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.

COMMANDMENT 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

COMMANDMENT 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something
you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

COMMANDMENT 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and
a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

COMMANDMENT 9
Marriage and love are purely matters of chemistry.
That is why wife treats husband like toxic waste.

COMMANDMENT 10
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.

BONUS COMMANDMENT STORY
A long married couple came upon a wishing well.
The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
The wife decided to make a wish too.
But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
The husband was stunned for a moment but then smiled and said,
"Hey!...This thing really works!"

On a similar note:
I am glad I married a helluva woman who always supports me in whatever I endeavour. I salute her for being with me in good and bad times. Mmmmmm.....I should thank my lucky star.

3 Things A Woman Should Know

Coffee black

On average women say 7000 words per day. Men manage just over 2000.

An etiquette writer of the 1840s advised "Ladies may wipe their lips on the table cloth, but not blow their noses on it".

A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband doesn't give her coffee.

Can these be true?

I was thinking to myself maybe No.1 is only true statement because generally I find that women tends to talk more than men.

No.2 statement might be impractical to practice in this period of time, maybe during the 1840s it's was acceptable.( but I know some men still wipe their lips on the table cloth; have not seen women doing it )

No.3 statement I think is the custom that deem fit for this practice. (I would be too glad to give coffee to my woman everyday because I love coffee)

What have you to say on these statements?

Swearing on the blogs.

I browse through many blogs over a period of time. As usual some of the blogs I read more others less. I guess everyone does the same here. What do you think when we write our rants we should swear it out? (because of stressed) Since it's our own private journal and we can do whatever we want. I can agree that's our space and our rights. But should we swear in our rants for whatever reasons? maybe. The swear words here I meant are the ones that are vulgar or offensive as well as the famous F@*#.

I have said in a few comments :- "Blame the reader not the blogger. If you don’t like the blog don’t come near it. Simple as that.". True to this statement, for me if I am not comfortable with blogs that swear too much I will just move on. That's typically me, no quarrels. Here what I am saying is, if you swear on your blogs all the time using the vulgar or offensive words. Pause ....... (I am not referring to anyone here). Just think for awhile............. what will people think of you? not your blog but physically you. Worst if they know who you are by appearance. But if you think you are comfortable with the labeling that you always swear and it's kind of cool and alright , so be it. Remember to always think of the cause and effect. I am not saying we cannot swear but swear diligently. (kind of a balance act) Believe me without realising, it might become a habit if we are not careful on swearing. And when we swear it's very little we can take back what we swore.

Generally as we grower older maybe wiser we don't swear that much or rather we don't swear with the "taboo words " that is too extreme. You can check this out from Orion, here and here

Personally I try not to swear at all because I believe it reflects badly on me.(not only on my blogs as well as in everyday speaking) What if my children reads my blogs and find that their dad always use the swear words. Can't imaging this going to happen, can I. Especially when we are talking/ writing and it's the other half that's is going to judge us. But to all of us to err is human but hopefully we can correct it as we go along.